The teacher’s best friend

March.22. 2014

Years ago, in a far off country, there was a scandal involving a daycare center.

The whole thing came to light when a parent left her child at the daycare center one day. Due to a change of plans, she decided to go back and pick up her child for the day.

When she arrived at the daycare center, she was surprised to find her child sleeping peacefully.

How could this be, she wondered. The child was positively jumping up and down when she had left him there just a short while ago.

Turned out, it seems, as soon as her child was dropped off, he was given some milk to drink. And yes, you guessed it. The milk was spiked with sleeping medication.

You’ll have to admire the ingenuity behind the plan.

We all know children are filled with energy so how do you suppress all that energy and get them to quiet down?

No problem, just administer a small dose of sleeping medication.

I forgot the finer details of that case but I remember it caused quite a stir in the country

Now, fast forward to the present and to another country – a country that is far more advanced and enlightened, and should I say, a country that is particularly protective of everyone’s rights, especially those of the weak and the helpless.

But children will be children, even in this advanced country.

So how do you control all that energy in these children too? How do you make them behave and sit quietly in their places so that they can ‘learn’ in the classroom?

Enter the teacher’s best friend, otherwise known as Ritalin.

Different place and different time, but same strategy and same outcome.

With the teacher’s best friend, you can produce perfectly behaved children without any effort. There’s no need to teach discipline, no need to teach responsibility and respect. All you have to do is to administer the drug and voila, instant model children.

Just one more example of the wonders of modern science.

And everyone lives happily ever after.

The teachers, because now their job is easier, and the parents, because they can enjoy their lives without having to deal with the frequent calls from the school principal and counselors.

PS.

To be fair to teachers, their options are severely limited when it comes to curbing the boundless energy of young children.

In less ‘enlightened’ societies, the standard practice is to achieve it through physical means, but that option is ruled out by child psychologists in advanced countries as damaging to the children’s psyche.

So the only option left to teachers in these enlightened societies is to achieve it  through chemical means.

“Spare the rod and drug the child” is the new maxim.

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